Pre-Heat The Oven

I’d like to start this piece off with a little story…

Once upon a time, there was this girl who met this boy… TOTAL opposites.

She hadn’t really explored many people in her lifetime (sexually-speaking). She was more focused on relationships, rather than just living her “best life” single.

He hadn’t really spent time on just one female.. He was constantly going from girl to girl without any commitment in sight. Totally single and totally living his best life.

For some unknown reason.. The prude and the hoe fell in love and boom-shaka-laka.. A **relationship** was born.

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Well surprise I am the girl! (in case you couldn’t tell)

Now see… the thing about dating an “ex-hoe” is that there are some misconceptions about the sexual expertise of this said “hoe.” 

I can tell you from my experience… I was NERVOUS as fuuuuck to have sex with a guy who had had sex with more girls than triple the amount of guys I had been with (I mean.. In my defense I was only a year after losing my virginity).
 Anyways.. Moral of the story being… I was nervous. 

To my lovely surprise we BOTH had some inexperience in areas of sex that I was NOT expecting.

When going in bed with someone who had been labeled a “player,” you automatically think.. Okay, this dude is a fucking pro and I have no fucking idea what I am doing. I am gonna look stupid, he isn’t gonna like it, and I am probably going to start fucking crying of complete and total embarrassment. 

However, while I had zero idea how to actually have sex… a bitch DID know about this little thing called foreplay. Lemme tell you… Mr. Player had NO IDEA. 

Now before I get people calling me out and telling me I’m talking shit CHILL TF OUT FOR A SECOND. 

This is the sad reality of sex culture right now. Because of fuckin porn and ladies not saying JACK SHIT to fix it, we have these men who think that it is normal and totally cool with females to just try n stick that shit in right away… as if we are naturally waterfalls all the fucking time.

Of course… this was something that required communication and comfort to fix the sitchy-ation that we had going on. 
But when we fixed this little detail… lemme tell you… it made ALL the fucking difference **insert wave emoji and fire emoji** 

So…. the magical word…

Foreplay. 

Foreplay is probably HANDS down the most important part of sex. Without it…
#1 it’s not as satisfying for both parties
#2 sex is just boring without it

Sex without foreplay is like having a cake without frosting. Like yeah… shit still tastes good but like I want that extra POP and excitement to feel allllll the more entertained. 
 
Teaching someone about foreplay is actually so much fun because it is all so new that you both are eager to try it all out and you both get to learn and explore each others bodies. Not only does the quality of your sex get 17673992 times better, but the level of intimacy between you and your person skyrockets. 

When fixing this little ish with this dude, I literally told him “we are not gonna have sex for a month.. STRICTLY FOREPLAY.” 
First of all, he learned reaaaal quick how to do all my fun little tricks.
Second of all, the long awaited sex was AMAZING (although we didn’t actually make it to a month…)

Some of you people may say...
“Alissa… foreplay is just oral sex and touching.. There is nothing much to it” 

Why yes my friend, you are correct. But HOW you go about these things is where the fun of foreplay lies.

Tongue, Candles, Cuffs, Ice, Candy, Champagne, Toys… you name it… you can use that shit in foreplay.

But WHY is this so important? 

Well…. Foreplay is like prepping the oven before you start baking. 
Ya girls need some fucking prep before you start going at it!!

Girls who are “prepped” are more into sex, feel more intimate, more comfortable, and honestly have a better shot at cumming. So tbh… it’s a win-win. 

Overall, the easiest way to incorporate foreplay into your sexual routine is COMMUNICATION.

Prudes, don’t be afraid to tell them what you like/don’t like and hoes... don’t be afraid to step out of your comfort zone and the “regular.” With some tight communication and expertimenting, bOMB aSs sex can be born… which can not only please the both of you, but build an even stronger emotional connection as well. 

Sex is fun, don’t get me wrong. But guys… c’mon now.. Cant be trying to stick that shit in when its the Sahara desert, we need a little bit of warming up to get all the fluids flowin so we BOTH can have a good time.

So put some ice in your mouth and kiss around. Cuff those hands UPPP. Make it exciting, because I can promise you the whole “stick it in and missionary” bullshit gets old reaaaal quick.

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